Giada

I was in New Orleans looking for a place to live. I went to an apartment owned by Giada De Laurentis and she was showing me around. It was in the French Quarter and was classic New Orleans. The apartment had living quarters on one side of a courtyard and a small restaurant on the other. Giada was telling me how easy it was to run the restaurant and how much I would love living in New Orleans. Suddenly I was with Laurel and others from Ft. Collins and we were white-water rafting down a river. Darkness set in and it was very hard to see where we were going and to navigate around the rocks. I got scared and pulled over onto a sandy shoreline. I decided to go back to the apartment Giada had shown me and look at it again. Susan and one of her friends were with me and we had decided to move in together. We were talking over the logistics because the living quarters were quite small. Giada had told me that the rent was only $540 per month and I just couldn't see how I could pass up such a deal. Plus, I would finally realize my dream of owning my own restaurant. I was just worried that I wouldn't know how to run the restaurant and I really wanted someone I trusted to go into business with me.

Who's the Daddy?

I went on a trip to Colorado in a bus with a bunch of people. Most of the dream is a blur, but I remember two guys, one of whom had a blonde beard. I had had sex with both of them and was pregnant, but didn't know which one was the father. I had on a green sweater and was laying on my back in the bus. They were sitting next to me and I kept rubbing my belly. I told them the baby was due in July and we could find out then who the father was. They both looked at me so longingly, hoping that it was their baby.

Snowboarding School

I was going to compete at a swim meet in Colorado in the 100 IM. I was very excited and knew I was going to win. Russ showed up in a suit and tie and I was happy he was there to support me.

All of a sudden I was in Vail. Mom and dad had gone with me because I was deciding whether or not to go to snowboarding school there. First I went to an indoor training facility where all of the snowboarders were playing dodgeball. At first I was just standing there watching, but then someone threw a ball at me and I joined in. I realized they were testing me to see how good I was, and I started throwing balls at everyone, knocking people down with my strength. They were very surprised at how well I played. Then I went to a huge house owned by the snowboarding coach where all of the snowboarders lived. The house was like a ski lodge and I was wandering through it looking at all of the rooms. I was the only female snowboarder, but I thought it would be kind of fun to live with a bunch of guys. The house had 10 bedrooms and 10 bathrooms. The coach showed me which bed was available, and it was in a nook next to the stairs, with no door. The bathtub was dirty. In exchange for getting to live in the house for free, the snowboarders had to agree to work at Raising Cane's, a restaurant the coach owned in downtown Vail. The coach's wife came to talk to me to see how I felt about the arrangement. She was blonde and wore a lot of makeup. She had a hairy lip and when she leaned close to me to whisper something in my ear, I felt her moustache against my cheek and it grossed me out. I was laying on a bed talking to the guys. One guy was sitting at the foot of the bed and I accidentally farted. It didn't make a sound, but it rattled the bed, and he got up and left the room. No one else noticed. I went to Raising Cane's to observe the working environment. The cashier was pissed off at a customer who had left a drink sitting on the counter, leaving a wet ring. I was very interested in joining the snowboarding team, but I didn't think I could handle working at Raising Cane's.

Scary Middle Eastern Men

Holly was having a birthday party. I was trying to leave early because I was so tired, but she wanted me to stay. Sarah showed up late and that really made me want to leave. Holly and I got in her car and she started driving crazy fast. We were out in the country and she was going up and down hills and through streams. We finally stopped and got out of the car. She led me up to a hilltop where there was a chicken coop and some other little buildings. We were snooping around, trying to be quiet when we heard some men come out of a house. We hid behind a tree, but they saw us. They were Middle Eastern men and they had some kind of weapons in their hands. They started yelling at us and I tried to run away, but they caught me. Holly and I started telling them how much we liked hummus and falafel, thinking this would persuade them not to kill us.

Phyll Starmata

Susan, mom, dad, and I were on the cul-de-sac in Austin. A group of black guys arrived in a car. One of them was Derek, the cute basketball guy from the Y. One of the other guys had dreadlocks and seemed to be older than Susan and I. His name was Phyll Starmata. He and Susan took a liking to each other and went off on their merry way. Derek and I spent some time together and then he left. Susan came running up to me excitedly, holding up her hand and shouting, "I'm engaged!" She had on a little diamond ring. She told me that she and Phyll were getting married. It made me mad that she would be so stupid to get engaged to a guy on the same day she met him. I asked her why he happened to have an engagement ring so handy and she burst into tears. "Why can't you just be happy for me?" she shouted. I spent the rest of the dream trying to hook up with Derek. We kept texting each other, but there was something wrong with his phone and I could only read parts of his messages. We all went to a neighborhood pool together and went swimming. I had on a black swimsuit and my body looked great. I really wanted Derek to see me. Susan and Phyll were hugging and kissing and I was completely disgusted.

Mall Reunion

Russ and I were at my high school reunion, but it was at Lori Smith's house in Ft. Collins. She lived in a really big house right next to the mall. We were sitting at a bar upstairs and I got into a conversation with someone about why Russ had a ring and I didn't. Russ was very supportive and kept his arm around me, telling people that we were married. I told them why I kept my last name, and he hugged and kissed me. I had a cute haircut and lots of people were surprised and happy to see me. Ricky Wren came up to me and said, "It was so nice to see you again Diane." Then we were in a football stadium having a group picture taken on the bleachers. All the girls were trying to look sexy. After the picture was taken, Lori started telling us that if we wanted to purchase a copy, it would be $400 each. A bunch of us stood up and left at that point. Russ and I walked downstairs through a hallway and out into a parking lot, then into the mall. I said, "Wow, she really does live right next door to a mall."

The Sex Tape and the Lightning

I was a teacher at a school with Reuben Mosqueda. We had made a sex video that I kept in a box in my closet. I told Reuben I hadn't looked at it in years and couldn't remember what we had done. Reuben said that all he remembered was that I couldn't get enough of him. He asked me if he could tell people he was my boyfriend.

Next, I was floating in a lake or ocean on a little boat. Laurel and Susan were there with lots of other people. We were close to the shore and there was some type of celebration going on. Really cool lightning kept lighting up the sky and I was trying to get Susan to watch it. Every time she turned around the lightning disappeared and she got mad. Then I saw volcanoes erupting in the distance. Huge plumes of lava shot into the air. Laurel and I got into the water and started swimming. She told me that Rich had been to a convention and cheated on her. They were separating because he wouldn't come clean with all the details.

Leaking Pad

I was on a bus with a bunch of women. I think we were on a basketball trip. I had on white sweatpants and I started my period. For some reason, I was using a pad instead of a tampon and I leaked everywhere. I had blood running down my leg. I was embarrassed and was trying to get to a bathroom to change. There was a bathroom on the bus with a see-through curtain. I stepped behind it and tried taking off my clothes, but I was really sweaty and they were sticking to me. The bus had been in a roll-over accident earlier that day so the toilet had spilled everywhere. It was really gross and I was trying to avoid stepping in shit. I had to go back out to get new sweats from my bag, but there was someone asleep and she was using my bag as a pillow.

The Goat

I got home from a vacation with mom and dad. The walls of my house were bulging in different places from water damage. I couldn't figure out where the leak was coming from. I pulled out my washer from the wall to look behind it and there was a goat laying on the floor, curled up on a towel. I was startled and pulled my hand back quickly. "Poor little goat," I thought. "He probably needs something to eat and drink." As I was trying to find something for the goat, I called mom to see if she and dad would stop by my house on their way home so they could help me figure out the water damage. Mom said they were already on the road and had had to leave at 5:00 that morning. They lived somewhere on the east coast. She said they were carrying lots of meat in the car with them and they had to let it cool down to retain its flavor.

Unhappy Vacation

I was on vacation with a bunch of people. We were staying at a resort hotel in adjoining rooms. Sam and Rudy were with me, but Sam ran off and we couldn't find him. Dad was there and he was trying to help me find Sam. We were calling him and walking around. We finally gave up and were sitting somewhere outside the hotel. Suddenly Sam came around the corner. He was walking really funny. When he got up close, I could see what looked like a bag of skin filled with balls hanging from his neck. Kind of like a scrotum, but with more than two balls. Dad said he must have eaten something off the streets. I was really worried, but dad said he'd take him to the vet and that Sam would be ok.

Suddenly I was back in the hotel room and I was missing Russ and waiting on him to call me. All the people staying in the room with me left to go do something fun, but I stayed in the room waiting on the phone call. I needed to pee, but the bathrooms were in the adjoining room. When I walked in there, several girls were lounging around talking. The toilets had been unscrewed from the floor and were sitting in a corner. The girls said that the maintenance staff was trying to fix them, but it would be a while. I went back to my room and decided to pee in the tub. The tub was by the window looking out over the beach. I could see people down there organizing a game of volleyball, so I scrunched down in the tub to pee. I hadn't even gotten my jeans pulled down when the group of people appeared at the window. They didn't have enough people and were trying to recruit some more to come play volleyball. I told them I wasn't interested, so they decided to stay in the room and hang out with me. I stayed in the tub and they sat down and started watching TV. I was so sad because I hadn't heard from Russ.

I left the room to find a bathroom. When I came back, an older lady met me on the stairs and said she had answered the phone while I was gone. I started running up the stairs toward the room asking her if she knew who it was who had called. She said he wouldn't give his name, but had said he would call back. I knew it was Russ.

The group of friends who had left me alone in the room came back and I started crying. I felt really silly, but I didn't want to be left alone again. Everyone was very consoling and apolegetic.

Bad First Day of School

It was the first day of school and I was totally unprepared. We were in the classroom and I thought to myself, "Wow, I have a really small class this year." But then when I started counting kids I realized I had 18. They kept moving around the room and I could never get an accurate count. I decided to take attendance so I sat down at the computer. I didn't know any of their names yet and they were acting so belligerent and wouldn't tell me their names. The attendance program usually has their picture with their name underneath, but this time it just had folders they had designed with their numbers on them. There was a male assistant in the room with me and he said that they had designed the folders last year. I started calling out numbers and asking who was who. "Who's number 2?" and 5 kids raised their hands. They thought it was hilarious but it was really pissing me off. Then I saw some kids from last year and I was so sad that I didn't have them anymore. Victoria came into the room and gave me a big hug. I asked her who her teacher was and it was the new 5th grade teacher. She was scared to go to her new classroom, but I told her everything would be ok. There was door that adjoined my classroom to the next one and kids started walking through it. Then a fight broke out and I was trying to get my kids back in the classroom. One of the girls was such a bitch, and was yelling obscenities at someone in the other room. I decided we should have a class meeting, so I asked everyone to sit in a circle on the floor. I started counting down from 10, but they ignored me. I got some of them to sit, but most of them were still at their desks talking to their friends. I told them I would count down again and anyone who wasn't in the circle would lose their recess. They still ignored me. Since I didn't know any of their names, I didn't know who to keep in for recess. I was so frustrated by this time that I started yelling. The male assistant pointed and I saw Kathy kneeling down by a desk and scowling at me for losing control.

Breastfeeding

In my dream I was laying on my side in my bed asleep. Mom came into the room holding a baby and said, "It's time for you to nurse him." She laid the baby beside me on the bed. I looked down and saw that I had huge nipples. I took a rubber nipple and put it over my nipple, then nursed the baby.

Bad Checks and Bombs

Russ and I were in a grocery store buying food at the deli. When it came time to pay, he pulled out a checkbook with someone else's name on the checks and asked me if I thought we could get away with using them. I said ok so we both wrote checks to pay for our purchases. I got a letter in the mail that said they didn't know who the checks belonged to, but the account didn't exist and I owed them 17 cents. I asked Russ if he got a letter too, but he hadn't. I was mad that I was the only one who was going to have to pay.

I worked in some type of school/hospital with long hallways. I was running through a hallway at the top of the building and I could look down into the rooms because the walls didn't go all the way to the ceiling. I threw a couple of bombs into two of the classrooms. They weren't deadly bombs - it was some kind of prank. I didn't want to get caught and I didn't think anyone would suspect me. I had a friend who was in on the prank. When I came to work the next day, they were checking IDs and trying to figure out who had thrown the bombs. I worked the first shift and was able to avoid the ID checks. No one suspected me. When my friend came to relieve me, she was wearing a disguise with a moustache. I thought that was a good idea, but then she changed before she started working. I went home and found that I was locked out. I had to climb up on a shelf on the outside of my house to try and reach my door.

Gotta Go!

I was in a big house with a lot of people and it was Christmas. There were lots of kids and someone was trying to organize a talent show. I kept having to go to the bathroom and pee, but it was really hard to get any privacy and there was only one bathroom in the whole house. I was about to go again, but this time to poop, when I got pulled into the audience for the talent show. I had my pants partially pulled down and there were people sitting behind me. I was trying to pull my shirt down to cover my ass. I got to the point where I couldn't wait anymore and ran to the bathroom. It had a door like a stall and was in a big room. I locked the door and sat down to do my business, but somehow people kept walking in on me. I tried to get everyone out and was yelling, "I just locked the door five minutes ago! How are you people getting in here?" Someone handed me a magazine and I sat down and took a deep breath. I was finally alone!

Needles in My Neck

It was the last day of school and I was with my class visiting another school. We had brought sack lunches and were going to eat in their outdoor classroom. I had four IV needles stuck in my neck. I don't know why I had them, but I wanted them out. Johnna was helping me pull them out. When she pulled out the first one, a big arc of blood squirted everywhere. She quickly put a bandage over the wound to stop the bleeding, then pulled out the second needle. The same thing happened. There were teachers and kids standing all around and splatters of blood were on their clothes. I kept thinking, "This is so unsanitary," but I wanted those needles out! She finally got them all pulled and we were able to sit down and have lunch.

Fuzzy Feet

I was at school but it was the end of the year. I was explaining to another teacher how I taught long division. I was stretched out in a lawn chair and my students were sitting all around me. My feet were in Skylar's lap. I was barefoot and there were little white fuzzy things all over my feet. Kymber was pulling my toes and making them pop and it felt really good.

Will I Ever Graduate?

I was in college and it was the end of the semester. I had to turn in work to Kathy. It was something I had written and I knew it wasn't very good. She looked at it and told me things that were wrong. I felt embarrassed. I knew I had to finish this class in order to get my degree, but I just couldn't seem to do it. Every semester I missed a deadline and had to retake the class.

Suddenly I was somewhere with Russ and he was hugging me and telling me that everything was going to be ok. He seemed really tall. We walked into a house and suddenly I seemed as tall as he was. I loooked down and saw that he didn't have shoes on, but I did. He was standing in his sock feet.