Hotel Court

Russ and I were staying in a hotel. Our room had two queen size beds and an Asian couple was sleeping in one of them. In the morning, a maid came into our room and said she would have to take us to hotel court for having too many people in our room. We were all in bed and I started to protest, but then she saw Russ rolling a blunt and I knew we would have to go with her. We all followed her down to the lobby to hotel court. We were in a room with a bunch of other people and most of their cases were dismissed. Then we had to follow her to a second room where the judge was. There were student desks for us to sit in while we waited our turn. As I sat, I looked down and noticed a bag of weed sitting in the chair. I deduced that someone had left it there so they wouldn't get caught with it on their person when they went before the judge. I sat on top of it and whispered to Russ, "Look!" He had a bag of weed on top of the desk and was sifting through it. "What are you doing?" I exclaimed. "Do you want to go to hotel jail?"

My Name is Diane, and I'm a Prostitute

I was a prostitute who charged $20 for 20 minutes. My first client was a tall, skinny white man. He was a little nervous, but I was completely confident and told him he could have whatever he wanted as long as it lasted only 20 minutes. I walked toward him and pushed him back onto the bed. I unzipped his jeans and pulled out his penis. As it got hard, it got longer and longer. I had to back up about 3 feet from him to be able to put it in my mouth. I said, "You've got to be kidding me!" He couldn't believe that I was able to deep-throat him.

Pit Beef Sandwiches with Tiger Sauce

Watched Man v. Food before I went to bed and dreamed about pit beef sandwiches all night long. Also dreamed about Italian beef sandwiches dipped in au jus, dripping wet and delicious. Long, steamy Italian rolls and oily giardinera danced in the background.

Killer in the Courtroom

Journey Houck was in a custody hearing with his siblings. The judge was a very large old man with a thick gray beard and glasses. When the judge ruled that they could not stay with their parents and would become wards of the state, Journey pulled out a machine gun and shot and killed the judge along with several other innocent bystanders. The videotape of Journey shooting the judge was broadcast all over the country and people were shocked at what they saw. Journey had somehow escaped the courtroom and was on the run. I was at school teaching and heard about this on the news. When Journey walked into the classroom, I couldn't believe he was there. I welcomed him like I normally would and he sat down in our circle for class meeting. Another teacher came into the room and I whispered to her that this was the kid they were searching for. We quietly started planning an evacuation. The school morphed into a ship and I was trying to evacuate all 400 kids without Journey figuring out what was going on. I was very afraid of Journey and didn't want him to know that I knew what he had done. I was herding kids onto boats and pushing the boats away from the ship. Journey was sitting by himself and was very upset. I was still afraid of him, but I realized that he was just a child and I tried to sit with him and comfort him.